How to Instantly Make the Right Decisions
Jay D. Breitlow
The external "values push" from the world can feel never ending, and it can be easy to succumb to it.
Entertainment television, newspapers, magazines, and the internet are constantly trying to sell John Q. Public on watching or reading what they are putting "out there." A whole values system goes with publishing "news." Ever heard of the saying "if it bleeds, it leads"? Yikes!
Young girls need to look skinny or act a certain scandalous way; and in part, young men should chase girls who dress sexy and act accordingly. In the United States recently, a "popular" comedian made his personal values public about the topic of vaccination. In fact, he made it his personal ven-
ííHowever/ that doesn't need to be your reality because youi, conscious human being, have the ability to take the time to become crystal clear and identify your own core values.99
detta to vilify people who choose not to vaccinate their children.
The push from outside might feel unending! However, that doesn't need to be your reality because you, conscious human being, have the ability to take the time to become crystal clear and identify your own core values.
For instance, my values are listed as follows:
1. Family
2. Optimal human expression
3. Adventure/health
4. Time and financial freedom
I actually had to spend a fair amount of time to think of a situation when someone else's value system was pressed upon mine and it actually bent me. The reason for that is I tend to be very grounded in my values and choose to filter the world through my own lens (read: values).
When I go to the mall, I don't see Forever 21. Instead, I see The Children's Place and Barnes and Noble. Why? Because nothing sounds better to me than picking up a new swimsuit for my daughter to grow into while she plays in the sand and I kick back with a margarita to read my new book on the life of John D. Rockefeller.
This trip to the mall satisfies my primary (family) and tertiary (adventure) core value with my daughter's swimsuit because vacation with her is always an adventure. While my wife plays in the sand with her, I can satisfy my second core value (optimal human expression) by learning about one of the great business executives of the twentieth century.
I don't pick up things such as a Broncos jersey, a Coca-Cola T-shirt, a new "Keep Calm and Carry On" cell phone cover, a fancy Blu-ray player, the newest tablet, or a bucket of popcorn. Those items are not on my values radar.
Different values mean people see the world constantly through different lenses. If your values have not become clear, you easily succumb to whatever the external world tells you is important. There goes your time, money, and energy.
Decisions don't need to be difficult to make. Anything that the world runs at you, hold up your hand and filter it through your values checklist. When in doubt, say "no." Warren Buffett is not a great investor because of the number of times he says "yes." Instead, he is famous for his ability to say "no."
“if your values have not become clear, you easily succumb to whatever the external world tells you is important.99
What about work? I love being a chiropractor, but many people don't love their jobs. For instance, I have a friend who is a lawyer, and he has a values system that is similar to mine. He doesn't love his job, but he loves his family. The reason he goes to work and does it with excellence is that he sees his job as a way to provide for his family. It also affords him enough time off to be able to travel with his family. Would he rather not work? Yeah, I think so, but "putting up with tough clients" is easier for this guy because he sees his toddler son and newborn daughter in his work.
What about that woman at the DMV who always has a smile on her face? Look around her office. There are pictures of her family and friends everywhere. She is at worksmiling because she knows that she is putting food on the table and starting her kids through college with her efforts. Going to work is a value-based decision for sure.
One of the most valuable things I have done in my life is to discern what my values are. It is also of value to me to understand that others have different values systems too.
6iShe is at work smiling because she knows that she is putting food on the table and starting her kids through college with her efforts.99
Having this basic awareness is the equivalent of knowing that when I point to the cloudless sky and say the sky is red, I am saying that because I am wearing red-tinted sunglasses. Whereas my wife may say, "No, the sky is yellow," as she peers through her own yellow-tinted frames. Meanwhile, you are watching us and think, "There isn't a cloud in the sky. What are these people on? The sky is blue!"
Do I have to look through my wife's yellow-tinted lenses to know that she sees the world in a different color? Do I need to know her values to understand that she sees life's experiences differently than I do? The answer to these questions is an emphatic "no," but if I did know the color of her lenses, and thus her values, it might make things easier to comprehend.
It also may make it easier to understand why she loves HGTV. It's part of the reason why men are from Mars and women appear to be from Venus —different expressions of our own unique and authentic values systems.
If you would like a free "values search," hit us up with a Facebook message, a Tweet, or an e-mail. We would love to facilitate you on your own unique journey!
Jay D. Breitlow, DC, is a former nuclear engineer andpessimist turned optimistic chiropractor, entrepreneur, and coach. Dr. Jay believes there are teachings that come with every challenge of being authentically human, and all that is needed is a light to show us that the path we are walking on is divinely perfect. CoachJay (fDrTomPreston.com or 1-705-495-3330.
